Yes to all of this. I really get it. Moving to Europe shifted a lot for me too, but we live in a very rural area so food production and storage is really important still. My parents moved to Trieste, Italy, where they can get their daily bread and butcher cuts, and while I love our wild life, sometimes I really would prefer to not do it all myself. There’s a different cadence to city/town living and more social interaction for sure.
I think I operate sometimes out of a fear of scarcity, which is a good motivator but perhaps not the best mindset to be in. When I’m in Italy, all I sense is abundance and celebration, even in the smallest things.
Beautiful, thoughtful words, as usual. Thank you. ❤️
I needed to hear this SO badly today. With 6 kids, I feel like I am drowning. But if I create some good consistent habits that I do daily I feel like I’ll be able to manage! I don’t need yo get all the laundry done in 1 day, it’s ok to get 1 load done each day. It will definitely be a mental shift I’ll need to make but it’s time to do it! Thank you for sharing!!
As someone with a chronic illness who can’t do as much physically as I want to mentally, I have taken comfort from a Tolkien quote for many years, “Little by little, one travels far.” We all can benefit from your post and going a little more easy on ourselves when things are too much. ❤️
This is so timely for me. I've been feeling very burned out from everything I need to accomplish and feeling like I'm always behind. I have really been leaning into the idea of taking things in smaller bites. Especially food and meals. I've been giving my mental load a huge break by planning my meals only a day or two at a time. And I find I am wasting less, too.
I think often we can do things in bulk in the name of saving money, saving time, etc. BUT if we're trading time for money (work), then using that money to buy stuff that goes to waste, then the good news is that we can actually save a lot of energy by breaking that cycle to begin with!
Been thinking about this a lot lately too. Fatigue runs rampant this time of year when the sun comes out and suddenly I’ve got a house AND 10 acres to care for. I run myself into the ground and wonder why the burnout comes so easily. 🤪 This Spring I’m trying to fit in 10 minutes of weeding today instead of sporadic days with weary hours on end.
I JUST sat down with my husband last night and said “Honey, I suck at homemaking.”.
This writing was so timely. I am 5 mos PP with our 7th baby and this one is kicking my butt. I feel like my life is falling down around me and I just cannot keep up. I tend to be an “all or nothing” kind of person and it gets me into trouble bc I keep waiting for a large chunk of time to get things in order. The problem is that I just never have chunks of time.
Thanks for the encouragement to pick away a little at a time.
I feel this! I often think I'll get to things like baseboards, windows etc during my "window cleaning time" which is... nonexistent? Which I think is normal if you have a lot of kids/a busy job/ etc? And then beat myself up for skipping "window day" instead of just wiping smudges as they bother me.
Huh… this is really making me think. Between 4 loads of laundry waiting to be folded and always thinking a week ahead in meals, I can really relate. Sometimes I forget how much freedom there is in taking homemaking (or anything really) in bite sized forms. What a great compilation of thoughts, I’ll be mulling this over for sure. Thank you for sharing!
I'm right there with you. My husband and I came to the same realization after stints of living in Europe for different lengths of time (months to years). One of the challenges we've faced returning to the US each time has been being immersed back into a hustle and consumerism culture that swirls and envelops us and becomes 'the air we breathe' whether we are conscious of it or not. We've taken many steps to shift the way we've lived to accord better with a healthy understanding of capacity, but it's much harder when the pressures and voices of '
Thank you for sharing! This is just the reminder I needed. We have a mini washer and no dryer so I have to do two loads of laundry every day and if I stick to that rhythm, it never gets backed up. We have a small fridge as well and plan 3 meals at a time. It definitely keeps us from wasting food! With an infant and almost 7 year old, homeschooling, and homemaking I’m thankful for this reminder that I’m not bad at homemaking, I just have too big of a scope. I’ve been wanting to pare down even more because I think that will really help the daily flow!
I've been homemaking for 25 years and this is what I've also discovered along the way. There are so many moving parts in managing the home and the family, not to mention self-care, that to spend a great deal of time in one day working on any one thing leaves several other things undone. Focusing on only the next step or two of whatever I’m doing rather than completing the whole thing and accepting the slower pace is necessary. Then turning my attention to some of the other things that need done and getting them going helps prevent some things from being neglected all together.
Single focus projects are ok in the job market but the sheer number of things to do in the home requires being content with working on a little of this and a little of that at a time. A task that may take an hour or two to complete if worked on all at once, is better done over the course of a week or two when it comes to the home. Just a step or two at a time and then turn your focus to other things that need attention. We simply must be realistic about how much we can get done in a day, especially with the constant interruptions that are a natural part of home life as well.
When I was young and raising 5 kids, I was much more efficient than I am now. I always did laundry every day… now in my 80s I procrastinate and do it maybe every 2 weeks or more! Same with grocery shopping, I buy enough for a month and then struggle to put it away and then spend a day or two afterwards prepping food for that month’s meals. I thought I was so smart, but actually exhausting myself. Thanks for the reminder to act wisely.❤️
Welcome home! Food for thought, indeed. I ate this up…feeling so relatable. Having spent many summers in rural villages of Lebanon…everything moves at slower and more intentional pace. Over consumption isn’t a thing there. And the village is like a family effort of fresh produce, bakery, butcher shop, someone who has a milking cow or goat…all in a walking distance away. Life in rural Michigan/American, no matter how country, just doesn’t offer such conveniences any more, like it did once upon a time. So we need to choose our hards and do those things well, and be content and accomplished, rather than ran thin trying to do it all. Maintain them in smaller batches, so we’re not overwhelmed by the work.
I know this….but always need the reminder. So thank you ♥️
You've done it again, Shaye! EXACTLY the message I needed to hear at exactly the right time. Thank you as always for the encouragement and inspiration!
Yes to all of this. I really get it. Moving to Europe shifted a lot for me too, but we live in a very rural area so food production and storage is really important still. My parents moved to Trieste, Italy, where they can get their daily bread and butcher cuts, and while I love our wild life, sometimes I really would prefer to not do it all myself. There’s a different cadence to city/town living and more social interaction for sure.
I think I operate sometimes out of a fear of scarcity, which is a good motivator but perhaps not the best mindset to be in. When I’m in Italy, all I sense is abundance and celebration, even in the smallest things.
Beautiful, thoughtful words, as usual. Thank you. ❤️
I needed to hear this SO badly today. With 6 kids, I feel like I am drowning. But if I create some good consistent habits that I do daily I feel like I’ll be able to manage! I don’t need yo get all the laundry done in 1 day, it’s ok to get 1 load done each day. It will definitely be a mental shift I’ll need to make but it’s time to do it! Thank you for sharing!!
As someone with a chronic illness who can’t do as much physically as I want to mentally, I have taken comfort from a Tolkien quote for many years, “Little by little, one travels far.” We all can benefit from your post and going a little more easy on ourselves when things are too much. ❤️
This is so timely for me. I've been feeling very burned out from everything I need to accomplish and feeling like I'm always behind. I have really been leaning into the idea of taking things in smaller bites. Especially food and meals. I've been giving my mental load a huge break by planning my meals only a day or two at a time. And I find I am wasting less, too.
I think often we can do things in bulk in the name of saving money, saving time, etc. BUT if we're trading time for money (work), then using that money to buy stuff that goes to waste, then the good news is that we can actually save a lot of energy by breaking that cycle to begin with!
Been thinking about this a lot lately too. Fatigue runs rampant this time of year when the sun comes out and suddenly I’ve got a house AND 10 acres to care for. I run myself into the ground and wonder why the burnout comes so easily. 🤪 This Spring I’m trying to fit in 10 minutes of weeding today instead of sporadic days with weary hours on end.
My best advice ....stop living for social media and start living for you.
We only get one shot at this life on earth. Make it a good one.
I JUST sat down with my husband last night and said “Honey, I suck at homemaking.”.
This writing was so timely. I am 5 mos PP with our 7th baby and this one is kicking my butt. I feel like my life is falling down around me and I just cannot keep up. I tend to be an “all or nothing” kind of person and it gets me into trouble bc I keep waiting for a large chunk of time to get things in order. The problem is that I just never have chunks of time.
Thanks for the encouragement to pick away a little at a time.
I feel this! I often think I'll get to things like baseboards, windows etc during my "window cleaning time" which is... nonexistent? Which I think is normal if you have a lot of kids/a busy job/ etc? And then beat myself up for skipping "window day" instead of just wiping smudges as they bother me.
Huh… this is really making me think. Between 4 loads of laundry waiting to be folded and always thinking a week ahead in meals, I can really relate. Sometimes I forget how much freedom there is in taking homemaking (or anything really) in bite sized forms. What a great compilation of thoughts, I’ll be mulling this over for sure. Thank you for sharing!
I'm right there with you. My husband and I came to the same realization after stints of living in Europe for different lengths of time (months to years). One of the challenges we've faced returning to the US each time has been being immersed back into a hustle and consumerism culture that swirls and envelops us and becomes 'the air we breathe' whether we are conscious of it or not. We've taken many steps to shift the way we've lived to accord better with a healthy understanding of capacity, but it's much harder when the pressures and voices of '
"bigger!", or "more!" are ubiquitous.
Thank you for sharing! This is just the reminder I needed. We have a mini washer and no dryer so I have to do two loads of laundry every day and if I stick to that rhythm, it never gets backed up. We have a small fridge as well and plan 3 meals at a time. It definitely keeps us from wasting food! With an infant and almost 7 year old, homeschooling, and homemaking I’m thankful for this reminder that I’m not bad at homemaking, I just have too big of a scope. I’ve been wanting to pare down even more because I think that will really help the daily flow!
Living in another country will teach you this over and over…
1. Slow down
2. Be thankful for the present. Be thankful for everything.
3. Perspective makes a difference
I've been homemaking for 25 years and this is what I've also discovered along the way. There are so many moving parts in managing the home and the family, not to mention self-care, that to spend a great deal of time in one day working on any one thing leaves several other things undone. Focusing on only the next step or two of whatever I’m doing rather than completing the whole thing and accepting the slower pace is necessary. Then turning my attention to some of the other things that need done and getting them going helps prevent some things from being neglected all together.
Single focus projects are ok in the job market but the sheer number of things to do in the home requires being content with working on a little of this and a little of that at a time. A task that may take an hour or two to complete if worked on all at once, is better done over the course of a week or two when it comes to the home. Just a step or two at a time and then turn your focus to other things that need attention. We simply must be realistic about how much we can get done in a day, especially with the constant interruptions that are a natural part of home life as well.
When I was young and raising 5 kids, I was much more efficient than I am now. I always did laundry every day… now in my 80s I procrastinate and do it maybe every 2 weeks or more! Same with grocery shopping, I buy enough for a month and then struggle to put it away and then spend a day or two afterwards prepping food for that month’s meals. I thought I was so smart, but actually exhausting myself. Thanks for the reminder to act wisely.❤️
Welcome home! Food for thought, indeed. I ate this up…feeling so relatable. Having spent many summers in rural villages of Lebanon…everything moves at slower and more intentional pace. Over consumption isn’t a thing there. And the village is like a family effort of fresh produce, bakery, butcher shop, someone who has a milking cow or goat…all in a walking distance away. Life in rural Michigan/American, no matter how country, just doesn’t offer such conveniences any more, like it did once upon a time. So we need to choose our hards and do those things well, and be content and accomplished, rather than ran thin trying to do it all. Maintain them in smaller batches, so we’re not overwhelmed by the work.
I know this….but always need the reminder. So thank you ♥️
You've done it again, Shaye! EXACTLY the message I needed to hear at exactly the right time. Thank you as always for the encouragement and inspiration!
Perfect topic to mull over at 5:30 this morning while portioning out 6 months worth of Parmesan cheese for the freezer!